Say what you mean; mean what you say.

Pilgrims:

     As a value-added benefit of your subscription to this revelatory missive, provided is a primer on understanding what I'll call illusory speech; that being - words spoken that appear to carry one meaning, but in fact contain another. For those more anserine, I'll offer an example: when my spouse-mate says "It looks like the neighbors have raked their leaves." what's really being said is, "Go rake the leaves in our yard, so I'm no longer embarrassed by your acute lack of motivation!".
     To warm up, I'll provide my considerable insight for these well known saws; you'll get the idea.

When it's said - "To err is human, to forgive is divine." (Alexander Pope)
What it means - Only a fool would do that; fortunately, I'm not a fool.

When it's said - "A stitch in time saves nine." (Thomas Fuller)
What it means - Your planning skills are non-existant.

When it's said - "Neither a borrower nor a lender be." (William Shakespeare: Hamlet - Polonius, Act 1, Scene 3)
What it means - No.

     Now, let's get to more contemporary examples:

When it's said - "I want to thank every American who participated in this election." (Barak Obama)
What it means - Your check is in the mail.

When it's said - "Sarah Palin is the running mate who can best help me shake up Washington."
What it means - I hope to God this IS a beauty contest.

When it's said - "You have to be unique, and different, and shine in your own way." (Lady Gaga)
What it means - The freak show industry remains a strong career path.


When it's said - "You know, I'm a television personality. It's not like I'm a famous hooker or something." (Nancy Grace)
What it means - .....you know, I think she said exactly what she meant.

When it's said - "We are all capable of infinately more that we believe." (David Blaine)
What it means - I'll do anything for money.

When it's said - "Nobody and nothing will stop Russia on the road to strengthening democracy and ensuring human rights and freedoms." (Vladimir Putin)
What it means - I know where your entire family lives.

     That's enough for now drumsticks; you're now imbued with insight far beyond your station. Until next time, I'm out here on the ledge - loving the view.....

- est sicut scienta ad collegium me -