Pickens:
Now that the jet lag has dissipated, I'm finally able to provide my readership with a fluffed up version of events reasonably accurate account of my recent travels to the West African nation of Sierra Leone. This was my sixth visit to my friends at our sister church in the village of Maboleh, located in the central part of one of the poorest nations on earth. Many of you know this, but for those who don't, Maboleh is primarily a subsistence farming village, cut out of the jungle centuries ago, whose way of life has changed little from when the first huts were built. In 2009, we first visited the village and quickly became partners with the villagers there; over the years we have constructed latrines, painted schools and built a church.
The primary objective of our latest visit was developing a plan to construct housing in the village, for the teachers in the primary school (grades 1-6) that live elsewhere, and typically spend more to travel to/from school, than they make each day. There are 6 teachers and an aide (seen here) that, along with the Headmistress, are responsible for providing elementary education for more than 240 students, mostly from the village. Land for this project was donated by one of the families in the village. <Full disclosure alert: the Sierra Leonean idea of "donation" is a curious one. The family donated the land, but indicated that they would be happy to receive a monetary "gift" to honor their largesse. In America we call that a sale (or a shakedown).> This being the case, we were happy to provide said gift; happiness soon erupted.
With this piece of business out of the way, we then turned our attention to meeting with the Bishop and District Superintendent, to come to an agreement regarding the scope and ultimate cost of this project. Inasmuch as the school is a UMC school, these Conference officials have the ultimate authority over any buildings built for the school. This is an interesting twist, as there are typically multiple layers of authority figures to mollify, in nearly every circumstance. Assuaging concerns from church officials is merely one step; local village elders, Chiefs and ultimately the Paramount Chief (pictured) must also be satisfied with any plan, before providing their consent/blessing and permitting the effort to move forward.
Fortunately, our practice of meeting with the village elders, both Christian and Muslim, once again bore fruit. We explained all that we were doing, sought their input and gained agreement from those assembled. In all seriousness, I believe that we have been able to be successful there because we involve them in everything we do. We're there to address their needs and concerns, and they know that. Westerners in the past who've failed to understand this, and come to villages with fully developed agendas that do not take their interests into account, have not made lasting, sustainable relationships with the locals. They are our partners, not our workforce.
Having secured as much agreement and as much progress as possible on this trip, we then turned our attention to the remaining construction initiatives at the church that was built a little over a year ago. These Phase II efforts included tiling the altar and sanctuary of the church - this is typical in Sierra Leone, as an uncovered concrete floor will soon begin to crumble, given the humid environment and heavy use. We also provided funding to pay local carpenters to craft 40 new pews for the sanctuary, as the old ones were literally falling apart. Altar chairs and table, and metal windows for the adjacent parsonage complete the project. All these improvements should be completed by the end of March.
With this work underway, we then focused on an economic initiative undertaken by the women of the village. Last year, they formed a kind of co-op, the purpose of which was to raise crops for sale in the local markets. Their first year harvest yielded eight 50 kilo bags of ground nuts (delicious, by the way); these were stored and will be used to seed this year's crop that, along with cassava, will be harvested, processed and sold in what we believe will be the first of many steps on the road to provide the women of the village a better and more secure future. Visiting their fields and watching them work is a delight, and they're very proud to show it off.
We also do what we can to assist with the operations of the government run medical clinic, located at the end of the village. For years, we have brought donated supplies, bandages, ointments, etc. to provide them with the basics that often elude them, due to sporadic funding. This year, we asked Tahta, the nurse, to list the items she needed most, then we drove her to the nearest city, Makeni, where she was able to purchase several hundred dollars worth of supplies (pictured), that she'd otherwise never be able to obtain.
In a related development, we met a girl in the village that had an obviously acute infection on her finger. She told us she hadn't slept the night before due to the pain; looking at her finger (shown here - sorry, kinda gross), removed any doubt of that. As it was Saturday, the village clinic was closed, so we decided to take her to the hospital in Makeni to have the finger treated.
The abridged version of this story includes the trip to the hospital, her examination, the treatment - read, lancing - of the infected finger, and the screams and tears of what had to be a young girl terrified to death, not understanding much of what was happening to her. We ultimately wound up paying for her treatment and follow up visits, an astonishingly small sum - less than $20 US. It is likely that, without treatment, she would have lost her finger, perhaps her hand, and possibly her life; that's the grim reality of the third world.
We also made time to visit the UMC Secondary School (grades 7-12) located in Makeni, where each year we provide scholarships to the 4 top students from our village - 2 boys & 2 girls. The Principal has become a good friend and ally and we've been able to provide support to the school as well over the years. I'm seen here with several of the Maboleh students that we provide scholarships for, as well as with Bearcat and one of the teachers that I've befriended. He was the one who several years ago, led us up Wusum mountain; damn near killed me.
Our efforts in Maboleh and Makeni are only possible due to the incredible assistance and support of our driver, teammate and friend, Edison. Without him, we are literally and figuratively, babes in the woods. He is much more than a driver; he is our translator, our negotiator, our counselor and our partner in all that we do; his value cannot be overstated.
Our time there is also made much more tolerable by Rebeccah and her staff at the Women of Hope guesthouse in Makeni. In addition to being the best cook in West Africa, she too has become family to our teams over the years. She also has a wicked sense of humor.
In all, we spent 9 days away from home; in many ways, not long enough. Yes, I missed my blond bombshell, but leaving people that I've come to love is never easy. God willing, I'll return again to see my friends and see both our scheduled and future projects to conclusion. Thanks to all that support me and had the courage and apparent free time to read this all the way to the end. Don't get too used to this kinder, gentler stuff though. Ego sum infirmis........
Cherished Ones:
I hate January. There, I've said it. There are no redeeming qualities about the month named after Janus, the Roman god of Doorways. Seriously, who names an entire month after a doorway? This month, the most banal string of 31 days in every year, holds no hope or promise, and offers all the charm of frozen scat and this January has been particularly miserable.
Inasmuch as my fingers have been numb since last Thursday, this post will be what I call a Rachael Ray - short, but meaty. So, before my hands begin to resemble those of Ernest Shackleton, the following are my Top 5 Reasons To Hate January:
5. The Pennsylvania Auto Show - This lubed-up stepchild of the Farm Show (more on this to follow), is hopelessly mis-scheduled in a month where the utilization of the very products that are shamelessly peddled <pun alert> is seriously compromised by Mother Nature. Adding insult to this risk of injury are the usurious entry fees ($9) and parking fees ($10) gleefully collected by the churlish volunteers manning the turnstiles. Essentially, this is a torturous exercise - trudging through inclement weather, to a place that charges outlandish attendance fees, to view unaffordable merchandise that, if purchased, cannot be enjoyed for months to come.
4. Televised Awards Shows - Ok, we've got the People's Choice Awards, the Golden Globe Awards, the Critic's Choice Movie Awards, the Screen Actor's Guild Awards and the Grammy Awards all shoehorned into the month that celebrates doorways. I know, I know; as one who celebrates little as much as his own existence, it would logically follow that I would adore these nauseating spectacles of self-congratulation. However, while I appreciate décolletage as much as anyone, how anyone can subject themselves to the 1080dpi equivalent of a lava lamp is beyond me.
3. The Pennsylvania Farm Show - Much like the useless PA Auto Show, the Farm Show is visited upon us during the first full week of the year. Since 1917, this agrifest is a celebration of noxious odors, unbreathable air, hazardous ambulation (owing to the fecal matter and urine festooning the walkways) and incredibly large crowds of incredibly large people. Any of these would seem to be enough to dissuade even the most masochistic attendee; but despite all this, hordes belly up <second pun alert> to the baked potato stand, the milkshake stand, the French fry stand, the breaded mushroom stand, and this year's added feature, the bacon stand. This brings us to my next reason to hate January:
2. Diets - For the love of all that's holy, do I really need to be reminded that I've got the BMI of a manatee does every 3rd commercial have to be about diets and weight loss? We've just come through December, when every advertisement across all media portrayed attractive, happy partygoers eating and drinking their fill. In January though, we're jerked backwards - told that our excess was excessive, and we must repent of our calorie consuming ways, before it's too late. This is especially galling, as next month, we'll be force-fed <third pun alert> a steady stream of chocolate candy ads, to help us celebrate Valentine's Day. IT seems to me that binging and purging is not so much an eating disorder, as a suggested lifestyle. But, my number 1 reason for detesting January is:
1. The Weather - Although this may seem self-evident, January's weather is - without a doubt - the worst of all the months. Every Farmer's Almanac issued since the beginning of time bears this out. Terms like sleet, freezing rain, snow, ice, wind chill, and the newest one Polar Vortex, just pi** me off when I hear them, let alone suffer their influence and effect. In addition, aside from the conifers, nothing is alive! Who wants to go through a month where nearly every plant is dead? Additionally, this is the month where fashion is also dead. By the time we bundle ourselves in our overcoats, jackets, sweaters, sweatshirts, thermal undies, scarves, gloves, hats and balaclavas, we all appear to have the fashion sense of the homeless - inching our way down slick and slippery streets, tensing ourselves against an inevitable fall.
There it is dear ones; but lament not, this exorcise has thawed both my fingers and my outlook. In no time at all, we'll be rid of this accursed month and barreling through the shortest month of the year. I'm buoyed by my impending return to Africa, where both the weather and my welcome will be substantially warmer. I'll likely not bother you again until my return, when once again, I'll regale you with amazing tales and pictures of my exploits. As I've said before, Rick Warren is wrong. Ipsum enim est solum de me.
Devotees:
Well, we've made it yet again through another holiday season together; you, enjoying the warm glow of family and friends - me, enjoying the warm glow of an expertly mixed Bloody Mary. One of these days, I'll reveal the secret formula to the world's most perfect libation. Of course, I've pirated it myself, but that's the American way. Keep your fingers crossed, someday I'll share.
However, it's time to get down to business. As a significant contributor within the public domain, I am unfortunately subject to the same draconian rules and regulations to which lessers must abide as well. As such, this year's first post will be devoted solely to complying with dictums proffered by a myriad of government organizations, most of which carry unintelligible acronymnal (my blog, my word) labels. Simply put, I must provide an annual claim and related disclaimer, to ensure that my readership has no means of legal recourse, should any of my subsequent advice/instructional garble be taken seriously and actually acted upon. It is as follows:
CLAIM: Cheap Talk is a semi-regular outpouring of serious thought and well-reasoned opinion. Though rife with too many commas and not enough periods, it may be most accurately described as the Luminosity of blogs; that being, one that not only informs, but educates and improves brain function. Studies indicate that regular consumption of these posts increases cranial activity in the frontal lobes, producing a marked increase in salience and cogent thought. Further, long-term consumption of Cheap Talk is believed by many to elevate physical prowess, inflate self esteem, and enhance one's attractiveness to the opposite sex. Think of it as literary mother's milk.
DISCLAIMER: Cheap Talk is not for everyone. Do not read Cheap Talk if you have been diagnosed with a double digit IQ. Those struggling to "find themselves" should not review these posts, nor should those for whom educational pursuits were a challenge. Cheap Talk is not approved by the Food & Drug Administration, and has not been independently evaluated for accuracy or legitimacy (no duh!). People that consume this product should not do so without consulting their physician, as generally unpleasant side effects may result. Some readers have reported feeling a wave of euphoria; most others indicate feelings of discomfort that include headache, nausea and vomiting.
If you experience any of the following symptoms - large, unattractive rashes, sudden hair loss, an inability to focus, vertigo, drooling, inappropriate social behavior, uncontrollable urges, sleeplessness, drowsiness, violent physical or vocal outbursts - consult your physician immediately. If, after reading Cheap Talk, you develop overwhelming thoughts of suicide or murder, or if you are driven to destroy everything you come into contact with, seek professional help right away. Subscribers who are already societal misfits are cautioned that abusing Cheap Talk may lead to addictive behaviors patterns. In rare cases of overdose, it is reported that speaking in tongues or spontaneously yelling "Get this crap away from me!" has occurred. If you experience an erection lasting more than 4 hours, you're on your own.
There, that should cover both this topic and my fanny. I urge you to remain vigilant and watch for posts in the near future that will surely astound you. In the near term, with my trusty travelling companion Bearcat, I've got a camping trip planned, as well as a return to Sierra Leone. In the months thereafter, watch for further exploits that will include the launch of yet another kayak season, an ASP trip to West Virginia, and Lord knows what else. It's not easy being me, but it sure is fun......
Curabitur ut risus.
